There are parts of our selves that we hide because we are ashamed, we are fearful of exposure, and we are guilty and desire to avoid accountability. These motivations lead to estrangement not only from others but from our ego self which we put forward for other people to see. After a while we forget about the parts of ourselves which we have disowned but they have a way of leaking out from time to time much to our chagrin and horror.
In my psychotherapy sessions this is a common scenario:
Client describes the situation sometimes for 10, 15, 20 minutes.
I say, "What do you make of that?"
They say, "I don't know."
I say, "I know you don't think you know, because you have come here to talk about it to try to sort it out, but I think you do know."
There is a pause and then they tell me.
I think to myself, "You don't need a weatherman to know which way the wind blows."
For Subterranean Homesick Blues by Bob Dylan Click here.
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Many studies show that talking to strangers is good for mental health and well being. Talking to strangers provides a sense of connection with others which is a skill in spiritual intelligence.
In psychotherapy self determination theory is an underlying understanding of what makes people tick. It helps the therapist and the client to understand what motivates the clients to engage in psychotherapy. Often the initial motivating factors are extrinsic, but as the client becomes engaged in the process hopefully the motivation becomes intrinsic.
Cinema Therapy has a great video about movies about happy marriages.
This clip shows Julia Child sharing with her husband that she would like to find something to do that she loves. At first he tells her she should make hats, but then he asks, "What do you really like to do?" and she says, "Eat."
